Posted in TV | music on February 27, 2013

Kimmel

Morrissey cancelled his appearance on Kimmel last night, but apparently he still tuned in. Here's what he thought:

I was disappointed with last night's Jimmy Kimmel Show wherein our smiling host managed to ridicule depression (70% of Americans have experienced depression according to the National Institute of Mental Health). He then found time to ridicule healthy eating (the obesity epidemic in the U.S. costs $147 billion per year in medical expenditure), and he also ridiculed the notion that animals should be entitled to the possession of their own lives. Furthermore, he found time to jokingly promote gun-ownership - hugely amusing for the parents at Sandy Hook, no doubt. He also promoted his special guests Duck Dynasty - who kill beings for fun. None of the above issues are, of course, as important as Jimmy Kimmel himself, who has finally revealed his show to have an overwhelming loss of meaning. Tune in and relive the intellectual fog of the 1950s.

Morrissey
Catch Morrissey on his rescheduled tour.

---

      

Comments (99)

morrissey rides a cock horse...

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:23 PM

Morrissey can never not suck. He's the worst human alive.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:24 PM

Morrissey, taking himself to seriously since 1985...

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:24 PM

well, he's got a point.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:25 PM

"Morissey keeps finding ways to depress us"

That line was pretty funny....get the fuck over yourself Moz

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:27 PM

Does anyone who's not gay or a mexican care about this guy anymore?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:28 PM

Morissey is a clown. He has the social outlook of an angsty ninth grader.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:32 PM

"Tune in and relive the intellectual fog of the 1950s"

That seems like something someone would say seconds before downing a huge cock

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:34 PM

Brilliant, Mozz !!

BV readers are a bunch of corporate tools, although they think of themselves as soooo indie. You're all end up as cubicle slaves and lab hamsters.

Posted by ME | February 27, 2013 4:36 PM

Morrisey should start his own late night show, speak on these topics, and put his money where his fucking mouth is. Oh and noone would watch, and it would be canceled after a week. He obviously wasn't disgusted to turn it off either, so he just fed his ratings.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:37 PM

Well, to be fair, he's right, but he also needs to lighten up.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:38 PM

Actually, to the poster above, if Morrissey had a talk show, I would definitely watch. I don't even agree with him on most issues, but it's Morrissey, so of course people would watch. He has a better sense of humor than most people give him credit for by the way or do some of you not get irony?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:40 PM

I get it, being an intolerant prick and hating a thoughtful man is the new not being an intolerant prick and hating a thoughtful man.

I'm sure the gay-bashing here is supposed to be ironic.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:40 PM

Dear 4:40 pm, are you just figuring this out about BV posters, New Yorkers in general, and hipsters in particular? These are, afterall, the same people who go to concerts and play with their smart phones the entire time.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:42 PM

yep. I've gotten everything that was intended as strictly ironic and what was intended in full seriousness.

I'm the Clarity King

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:43 PM

Morrissey is a dickhead but so is Jimmy Kimmel

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:43 PM

Jimmy Kimmel is an asshole. We can all agree on that, right?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:44 PM

4:36-says the fan of a guy who puts his shitty albums out on major labels...

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:44 PM

Let's see . . . who has made a more meaningful contribution to culture -- (1) Morrissey; (2) Jimmy Kimmel; or (3) Duck Dynasty?

This is an easy question.

By the way, do people actually watch a reality show about a family that makes duck calls?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:46 PM

^Jimmy Kimmel, duh

So Morissey is pretty much insufferable huh?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:49 PM

4:46-the answer is none of the above. morrissey and his fans are tools. kimmel is a fratboy and duck dynasty will be forgotten in a year. all anybody missed was morrissey doing that "people are the same everywhere" song once again

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:53 PM

meh, if you can eat a cock you can eat a hamburger. Man up 'Moz'.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:55 PM

Isn't this the guy who said The 2011 Norway Massacre was no worse than what happens everyday at KFC?

Isn't this the guy who's most popular album in the last 10 years had him on the cover shooting a tommy gun?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:56 PM

Morrissey has a great sense of humor!

Wait, this is a joke, right?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:56 PM

Moz is gayer and fatter than J Murphy

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 4:59 PM

file under: who cares?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 5:00 PM

Moz is gayer and fatter than Bruce Vilanch

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 5:05 PM

I find it hilarious that he feels the need to review a late-night talk show that he decided not to perform on. Not performing already lets everyone know how you feel, just leave it at that. But no, this is Morrissey. And at age 50-something he still must act like an insufferable child.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 5:07 PM

Nothing I love more then listening to a 50 year old man piss and moan all the time!

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 5:13 PM

fuck off you whinging sod

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 5:17 PM

Oh cool, gay jokes. Very progressive, BV readers.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 5:49 PM

Moz got what he wanted (promoting himself without having to sing) and so did Jimmy Kimmel (much bigger publicity for his show than actually having Moz sing). they should pretend to fight more often.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 5:51 PM

4:42 -- ouch, a little too close to home.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 5:53 PM

I'm sure he would have written a glowing review of himself... had he performed instead of sitting on the couch watching the people that he detests enough not to perform. Get your fucking head together. I'm gonna go eat a burger and think that one's for Morrisey.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 5:56 PM

What are all Morrissey's fans going to do when it comes out that he's white power racist and pedophile? Probably still make up excuses for him. Worst person, worst fanbase. He needs to be set on fire and laughed at.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:05 PM

tell me more about "healthy eating," guy who keeps canceling shows because he has Dickie Barrett's Esophagus.

the U.S. didn't have an obesity epidemic till Morrissey moved here (and I mention that only because whining about the "obesity epidemic" hoax is a stupidly fatphobic move that does not reflect well on Moz's integrity)

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:08 PM

@4:34- WIN!

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:10 PM

Oh Morrissey. In the days when you were hopelessly poor, I just liked you more.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:16 PM

I clicked on this article because of Morrissey's name and now I'm seeing ads for the Firefly Music Festival, which I've decided to go to and buy a hamburger while I'm there. This is what he gets for opening his mouth.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:25 PM

This old queen needs a throne (to shit ulcer blood into)

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:37 PM

I generally don't take dietary advise from men that put other men's cocks down their throats

So there's that.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:40 PM

hey you guys, being a homophobic imbecile is so 4 years ago!

READ A BOOK! Listen to songs that aren't about summer.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:46 PM

cheers to morrissey for standing up for his convictions. pulling out of the show was more punk rock than anything the bullshit hipster commentators on here would ever have the balls to do.
shame on jimmy kimmel. fuck the duck dynasty inbreds.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:57 PM

I'm not homophobic. I just think you're a faggot.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:57 PM

Kimmel is funny, you guys are whack

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 6:59 PM

Sorry 6:57, but there is nothing "punk rock" about pulling out of a gig.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 7:17 PM

What a quay

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 7:18 PM

Kimmel is a gross breeder and none of my friends would dare put his cock in our mouth.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 7:23 PM

7:23 you never know who's on the other side of the glory hole, n'est pas?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 7:25 PM

Bummed he cancelled. I was hoping he'd play Girlfriend in a Coma.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 8:15 PM

Jimmy Kimmel is the Nickelback of comedy.

Good for Mozzer. I wouldn't go near those Duck Dynasty nuts either.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 8:22 PM

morrissey is the morrissey of music...

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 9:04 PM

Grottis Hendmundson

Posted by I think Moz was right this time. I'm going to support him every step of the way. | February 27, 2013 9:31 PM

morrissey has not made any good music in 25 years. if he died now, would anyone care?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 10:23 PM

super douche move jimmy kimmel. super douche.

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 10:39 PM

kimmel is shit

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 10:43 PM

Oh yah baby! He is the the Gary "US" Bonds of Merry Ole Englande!

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 11:21 PM

lifetime prevalence in the U.S. is 16.5%. IN YOUR FACE MORISSEY!
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/statistics/1mdd_adult.shtml

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 11:21 PM

so wait a minute...the Smiths are back together?

Posted by Anonymous | February 27, 2013 11:53 PM

You know, as much as I hate sanctimonious people, at least Morrissey stands for something. I'l give him that. He's easy to mock but he isn't full of shit like most people with a cause of the week.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 12:18 AM

his cause has become nothing but an excuse to throw tantrums and a means for publicity at this point. if he raised these points quietly or with a modicum of tact, then it would be admirable, but the fact that he just acts like a dick because nobody buys his records anymore makes any of his points moot. offended carnivores are just as obnoxious, if not more so, but i really wish that stephen would just go quietly into the night because he's not doing the furry creatures any favours...

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 12:22 AM

Morrissey is a child.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 12:28 AM

Kimmel is the king douche of frat mountain, enough said.

Morrisey has sucked since he lost Johnny Marr. But at least he stands for something and is creating.

Posted by styrofoam | February 28, 2013 12:58 AM

The firefly ads are a total joke right? Who would go to that festival?

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 2:07 AM

To the douce that keeps posting "at least Morrissey stands for something":

So, you support Farrakhan, Assad, Hitler, and the others that stand for something as well?

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 6:45 AM

Morrissey is the greatest living being currently on the planet. I'm DEAD f'ing serious. I wish there was a global revolution and he was the ruler of Earth.

Then we'd have a planet I'd be happy to have my grandchildren grow up in.

F meat eaters, F hipsters and F jimmy kimmel.

and F anyone who snarks at this post.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 8:01 AM

I love Moz and Duck Dynasty. I liked Jimmy when he was chubby with Carolla.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 8:02 AM

hey 6:45 - I personally support 2 of them.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 8:06 AM

he'a STILL fat 8:02

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 8:07 AM

Morrissey has a point, and I am glad he did not attend the show
As "irrelevant" and "ridiculous" as he has been dubbed, his no appearance gave Kimmel material to exploit during his show
To ridicule a potential guest because of his beliefs is not only impolite but also pathetic

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 8:24 AM

8:24

Yeah, but it's good for ratings. And extremist nut job animal lovers make easy targets. They both got publicity out of it. That's showbiz.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 8:50 AM

if stephen was ruler of earth it would be forced labour camps for carnivores and everybody would have to prostrate before photos of james dean. mandatory listening to nothing but new york dolls and forced laughter at his so-called witticisms. i'd volunteer to be first against the wall.

8:01-f you bedwetter...

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 8:53 AM

Someone needs to turn Morrissey's asshole into a fountain of blood. What a queef cannon.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 9:27 AM

Morrissey!!!

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 10:15 AM

sounds like paradise to me 8:53.

and the only wetness i get on the bed is the splooge that doesn't land on your mother.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 11:11 AM

Duck Dynasty....Just ridiculous. Kimmel is a douche.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 11:20 AM

Oh jeez, go back to humping rocks and your chocolate bars dude.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 12:13 PM

Duck a l'Orange >>>>> Morrissey


ALL DAY

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 12:36 PM

11:11-wow, that joke was edgy in 6th grade...

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 12:50 PM

WTF is Duck Dynasty? I watched Kimmel once. Couldn't get past 20 minutes. He's a tool. 850 "And extremist nut job animal lovers" I don't see anything "extreme" about loving defenseless animals! At least Morrissey stands for something. More than I can say about idiots like you 850.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 2:12 PM

Ok I googled Duck Dynasty. Good for Morrissey. It looks like another awful tv show. hHow can people watch garbage like that?

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 3:23 PM

http://insidetv.ew.com/2013/02/28/duck-dynasty-ratings-morrissey/

Hmm, a show that gets 8.6 million viewers or a fat gay 55 year old Brit who is big with the over 40 fag hag crowd?

Looks like Jimmy made the right choice

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 4:53 PM

453 If it's about ratings, why not have the cast of Jersey Shore on? Morrissey is a music legend. That show is for morons as is Kimmel's show.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 6:19 PM

I'm sure he's had the cast of Jersey Shore, you dummy. I'm also sure it was far more entertaining than a fat gay Englishman with a horrible wig singing the same song yet again.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 6:33 PM

633 And when they were on that dopey show I'm sure you were watching, probably with your dick in hand. Morrissey still sells out shows all the time. If The Smiths ever reformed people on here would be going nuts for tix. Plenty of people still seem to like the "fat gay Englishman"!

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 7:38 PM

cool, bro

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 8:45 PM

@212

Moz doesn't "stand" for anything. He's just a silly British twat who also happens to be a nut job animal lover. Personally I can't stand animals-god's second mistake- but they are hardly "defenseless". If you had half a brain you would know they are protected against "cruelty", but that doesn't mean one can't enjoy a steak or pork chop whenever one so desires. Meat is here to stay, like it or lump it.

Posted by Anonymous | February 28, 2013 9:37 PM

@937 "Personally I can't stand animals-god's second mistake' I take it YOU are the third! What a loser!

Posted by Anonymous | March 1, 2013 1:18 AM

Suxygen. Ammirite?

Posted by two way radio | March 1, 2013 5:04 AM

Meat eaters poop out chunks of rotting pork in a disgusting fashion.

Posted by Anonymous | March 1, 2013 5:55 AM

I think 9:37 meant humans were god's first mistake. I have to agree.

Posted by Anonymous | March 1, 2013 10:05 AM

10:05

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Finally someone w a brain gets it!
'god's 2nd mistake' is quote from Goethe and you're exactly right-
about humans being the 1st mistake.

Posted by Anonymous | March 1, 2013 12:45 PM

Artists these days are soulless. No wonder why music is so terrible because their fans are lemmings. They are inert, superficial, and lack any passion. Morrissey and Ruse of Fools are one of the few artists who stand for something; still sings about something that matters. Yet these lemmings just go on, living their quiet, sad, and pathetic lives. Go on, act like the sheep you so enjoy wearing. "Bah...bah...bah..." goes these sheep who think they are men.

Posted by Not Anonymous | March 2, 2013 1:39 AM

That show is the epitome of mediocrity and absolute sheer stupidity anyway.

Posted by Roland Serra | March 2, 2013 3:56 AM

Like the guy thinks he is funny, but he is just creepy and pathetic.

Posted by Anonymous | March 2, 2013 4:07 AM

Its like for the standards of the show, being repulsive and obnoxious is supposed to be interesting and sexy or something.

Posted by Anonymous | March 2, 2013 4:16 AM

East added East to West. An' shut the door, Mama. Walls sever fog.

Posted by mutcheck | March 2, 2013 4:56 AM

^ Moz underground code activation phrase - get ready for crazy vegan zombies crawling Times Square today, eating rotting vegetable flesh

Posted by Anonymous | March 2, 2013 10:06 AM

Morrisee is kewl

Posted by Anonymous | March 2, 2013 10:15 AM

Leave a Comment