Posted in music on December 9, 2013

intro by Bill Pearis

Wax Idols @ Cake Shop in May (more by Chris La Putt)
Wax Idols

We asked a bunch of artists to submit Top 10 of 2013 lists. Most of them just sent their favorite records. But sometimes they surprise us like Wax Idols and No Joy did with their similar, but very different BV-themed lists.

Read No Joy's list HERE. Wax Idols' is below...

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Wax Idols's Hether Fortune, always the outspoken button-pusher, tells us the:
"Top 5 Things I Loved About The BrooklynVegan Comment Section in 2013"

1) ANONYMOUS TROLLING!
What an incredible cesspool of cowardly morons with nothing better to do with their time. Truly an amazing sight! Like a watering trough for the dredges of Internet society. No name, no face, no accountability - just loads and loads of hilarious bullshit!

2) SEXIST COMMENTARY!
Oh buddy - if you're a woman & you want to be verbally degraded by strangers, look no further! THIS IS THE PLACE.

3) BORED NERDS WITH O-P-I-N-I-O-N-S!
Do you guys live in your respective mothers' basements or WHAT ? You are killing it! What kind of porn are you into? Have you ever seen a cheerleader smear shit all over herself? Just curious.

4) THE COMRADERY!
This year I was really moved by the supportive banter between you half-witted peasants. It's like, "All for 1 and 1 for all!" Or like, "When in Rome..."

5) THE COMPLETE LACK OF RELEVANCE OR SENSE!
Hands down - the BEST thing about the comment section this year was how little any of it actually had to do with the music or events being covered. I don't know about you, but I like my social discourse to be as meaningless & irrelevant as possible. Absolutely breathtaking stuff this year y'all. God bless!

Hether also was recently seen playing as a member of White Lung (who also gave us a year-end list).

Wax Idols and No Joy put out terrific albums this year, too, that found them both heading in new sonic directions; the former with gothy post-punk on Discipline + Desire; and the latter turned down the noise to make room for moody, ethereal textures on Wait to Pleasure.

No Joy's end-of-year list is HERE.

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Comments (79)

I'd pee in her butt.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:02 PM

The same 5 generic comments used to describe anonymous commenters on any website. Much like their music, this lacks originality.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:05 PM

lolz oh like these #pellycore folks can deal with actual dialogue; they just cry mansplaining anyhow.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:05 PM

She got trolled pretty hard

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:09 PM

A cry for relevance. Generic, uninspiring music.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:09 PM

Haha. Some ugly chick got her feelings bent out of shape.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:12 PM

How was this year's comments different from any other year?

Also, they forgot cobralegs.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:16 PM

Would not.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:16 PM

Boo hoo hoo. These broads are so rough I don't even want to cum in their ears.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:16 PM

Does anyone really think that the comments section here is worthwhile for anything but trolling?

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:19 PM

^hummus talk
D pontificating

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:22 PM

These chicks are screwed. They're too thin-skinned for showbiz and not good looking enough to land a decent man.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:26 PM

"A cry for relevance. Generic, uninspiring music."

so true

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:33 PM

I bet she gives great blowies with that angry mouth

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 3:59 PM

Different breed of dogs also require different shampoo and conditioners . Some shampoos are only fit for larger breed of dogs wherelse others are only fit for small breeds like the Chi hua hua.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 4:20 PM

my top 3:
1) Max Horwich has added a sense of purpose to this blog this year
2) The hummus jokes were certainly more robust than ever
3) we all learned what "decks" are

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 4:22 PM

The Hether Fortunes and Mish Ways out there are confusing, especially Mish Way. She doesn't want people to call her a whore, and yet she goes and writes articles on Noisey and Salon about how she has never been faithful to any of her boyfriends, how she gives oral and how she was in a cuckold relationship with some Florida band member whose name might rhyme with Smerchandise. I personally don't know many women who would consider that normal, sane or self-respecting behavior and while I admit that the moral compass is self defined, they exhibit behavior that at the very least could be labeled as "deviant" in a negative way.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 4:29 PM

a couple years ago they woulda been on suicide girls and that would be that

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 4:39 PM

1) Yani
2) Max Horwich
3) D

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 4:43 PM

4:29 - how do you know it's the guy from Merchandise?

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 4:50 PM

"she gives oral" ? Really. Wow, that is pretty *deviant*.

I'll bet she's a toe sucker too.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 4:58 PM

4:50 - Just a guess. In the article, she said she met the guy, also part of a band, at SXSW and had a long distance thing with him over Skype. She nicknamed him "Florida" in the article. They're from Tampa. It seemed to fit.

4:58 - It's not the fact she gives head that is deviant. The questionable behavior is that a "normal" person doesn't make a great effort to publicize every single one of their sex adventures and posing it as journalism. That goes for both male or female. It's not a feminist issue or some touchdown for empowering women through sex. It's a common decency issue that gets tiring to read of after awhile. She writes about her sex life A LOT, as if the world fucking needs to care or know about it.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 5:07 PM

i legitimately thought there would be a top 5 of actual comments made here.

but alas, it was just pontification.

could have at least snuck some hummus in there somewhere.

or to a lesser extent, an open letter to open letters to amanda palmer

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 5:08 PM

Guys you're all missing important stylistic tips from her:

1) end all your bullet points with exclamation marks!
2) WRITE IN BOLD.
3) And for that final touch spell your words through D-A-S-H-E-S!!!

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 5:10 PM

The thoughts of a woman who is good looking enough that people are willing to let her pretend to be smart.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 5:11 PM

Sounds like you all proved her point. Losers.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 5:23 PM

I can't believe she actually took all comments at face value. Wow.

BV comments are layers upon layers of intricate wit connected across different articles/posts with an inter-temporal characteristic and recurring actors & themes. It's a wonderful digital universe.

And she simply took everything literally at face value, lame :(

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 5:35 PM

5:11 bingo. And she is a sex worker. Getting older is not going to be kind to her.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 5:37 PM

get bent

Posted by blayne | December 9, 2013 5:52 PM

wow all the comments here really prove her point

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 6:08 PM

Lol at all of this. It's not like this chick is Alice Coltrane or Diamanda Gallas or PJ Harvey or something. The only readon anyone even knows who this chick is, is because of sex. It's certainly not because of her mediocre (at best) musical chops. You live by the sword you die by the sword.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 6:32 PM

Dawn answered I am stunned that a stay at home mom can earn $8732 in 1 month on the internet. check this link right here now,...F­B­3­­9.C­O­M

Posted by Trinidad Jackson | December 9, 2013 6:39 PM

why do they care so much about the comment section? because it's sexist, racist and...oh wait, my mom is calling me, dinner is serve baby! must bookmark this cheerleader link where she is defecating on herself for the after-dinner-jerk.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 6:58 PM

"peasants" is pretty classist, isn't it? disappointed that my feminist icons wax idols support a dated, oppressive system such as feudalism.

but i guess you can't expect much else from a class of musicians whose parents pay for their pr reps

Posted by more "punk" shit, who fuckin cares | December 9, 2013 7:43 PM

A lot of us "trolls" are fairly enlightened people who are sick to death of this 90's PC freakout rehash. Get bent, ma'am.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 7:44 PM

"live in your parents' basement" is pretty classist, also

not all of our parents pay for us to have apartments in brooklyn so we can get written about by our hack "journalist" friends

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 7:46 PM

Why is the BEST thing #5?

Meh, a dumb chick, with stupid tattoos and a big mouth.

She should probably go back to watching sub business men jerk off for a living.

-Serp Out

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 7:56 PM


"What an incredible cesspool of cowardly morons with nothing better to do with their time............ just loads and loads of hilarious bullshit!"

Kind of a lot like the mediocre cesspool that passes for music and art these days, isn't it?

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 8:05 PM

You can't see it coming
You can't find it anywhere else (anywhere else)
It's real, in Rio
Know something else (something else)
You can't feel it happening
You can feel it all by yourself

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 8:16 PM

This janky-ass ho is such a fat slut. Sloppy tits, a cunt that reeks of cat food, and a flabby fuckin turd cutter that makes me want to bang males instead. Which is great because I used to house pole and fuck guys at my alma mater, Wesleyan University.

-- Max Horwich, gay, Wesleyan '08

Posted by Max Horwich | December 9, 2013 8:51 PM

Can we have a "what is the drummer in that photo thinking about" contest please?

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 8:55 PM

The comments on BV are no more or less insipid than this band's music. Really if she spent as much time writing good music as she did on her manifestos this band would be great. But alas...just another half baked post-punk band.

PS- homegirl posted this article to her Facebook wall so here come the friends and fanbase, commenting just as anonymously.

Posted by Sean | December 9, 2013 9:16 PM

7:58 ftw

Posted by Only Bill Is Real | December 9, 2013 9:20 PM

5:35 has tasted the robust hummus platter of enlightenment.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 9:22 PM

5:35 really is correct.

But this half wit dominatrix is sooooooo much more evolved than the rest of us.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 9:39 PM

All for 1 and 1 for all brahs!!! Snipe Out.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 9:48 PM

get bent

Posted by blayne | December 9, 2013 9:51 PM

Recommended Service: RïchFïšhes.örg - Meet and Date wealthy people here now!dsfsdfd

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 10:04 PM

Personally I like to smear babaganoush all over my cheerleader girlfriend. I find it intensely erotic.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 10:21 PM

the iPods

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 10:41 PM

7:43 excellent analysis. While feudalism did present some advantages such as peasants being self-suficient within a stable economy and protected from roaming bandits, I sense that the author is being critical of the system, rather than laud it.

Posted by Anonymous | December 9, 2013 11:20 PM

It's a scary world that hack musicians, writers, and artists want to police into existence. Where anyone that doesn't like what you do is a troll.

Posted by bumface | December 10, 2013 2:36 AM

"This band sucks," and "would" are completely on topic. I don't know what she's talking about.

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 8:43 AM

Wow you guys are douchebags that got her point across. Keep jerking it to your mom in the time that youre not sitting at home typing away. Fuckin losers.

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 11:42 AM

This band sucks and I'm pretty sure most of us would tell this cunt to her face.

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 12:13 PM

Oh, and WOULD NOT. Grimy sex worker gash = no thank you.

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 12:13 PM

11:42, according to a BV poll done several months ago, most of the people who comment here type one-handed, so we jerk it to our moms while typing

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 12:22 PM

someone didnt have their daily dose of HUMMUS...

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 12:43 PM

Wait they are chicks? seriously?

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 1:02 PM

Could Wax Idols' be any more irrelevant?

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 1:04 PM

wow, I just googled this wax idols lady. She has a very awful chest tattoo for someone claiming to be so cool. When did she reinvent herself from Monster Energy Drink/Nickelback roadie to transgressive punk chick? who buys that kind of shit in 2013. Seriously.

Posted by bumface | December 10, 2013 1:41 PM

She is a professional dominatrix. She gets paid to verbally and physically degrade strangers.

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 1:59 PM

Her utter lack of self-aweness is stunning.

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 2:20 PM

I liked Wax Idols before. I like them even more now. And so far, 64 posts have proven every word she said.

Posted by Chris | December 10, 2013 3:15 PM

Mademoiselle Hether seems oh so offended by anon BV comments, and apparently spends an awful lot of time reading them on a regular basis, because, get this , women are verbally * degraded* !!! BUT Mother Monster has no problem whatsoever
with peeing in some dentist's mouth for $500/ session. THAT is not degradation. THAT is artistic expression. THAT is sexual exploration.

And this: "What an incredible cesspool of cowardly morons with nothing better to do with their time. Truly an amazing sight! Like a watering trough for the dredges of Internet society." Actually to me this sounds like a spot on description for your clientele.

And while it may be a cesspool, she quite likes it because it is, after all, "hilarious bullshit". I guess she never saw a cesspool she didn't like.

But wait there's more: This tres elegant rock goddess has nothing but contempt for the "half witted peasants" who ought to be held "accountable" for their internet indiscretions. I mean she's right, you know, anyone with 4,000 odd views of their official video obviously know what they're talking about. Did you know the Wax Idols have a record called * No Future* !!! SO- FUCKING- ORIGINAL, my god !!!!

I just have to reprint some of her lyrics, if I may: " We get born/ then we die/ that's the human condition." Honestly, she is like the female version of Lou Reed- where does she come up with this stuff?

LOL

Posted by Anonymous | December 10, 2013 7:24 PM

Wax idols downer version of best coast

Posted by Anonymous | December 11, 2013 11:02 AM

Its even sadder when the deathrock community doesn't embrace your music. turns around and defiles bloggers and writers who call her music bad. ohhh the sweet irony. pitchfork score 6.9 forever bb

Posted by Anonymous | December 11, 2013 11:07 AM

The only problem i have with this chick. is that she uses witchcraft as a ploy. no real witch brags about being one. especially on twitter smh

My name is up there. hit me up on twitter. i proved your pointless theory wrong. silly whore who calls people peasants. its 2013 c'mon. your not lydia lynch or the girl in the craft sit down.

Posted by Glossyloca | December 12, 2013 9:43 AM

Publicly spitting on the legacy of the bands she is parodying. This is the most desperate act to come along in a minute.

Posted by Anonymous | December 12, 2013 2:46 PM

glossyloca you're pretty hot. what's up?

Posted by Anonymous | December 12, 2013 3:35 PM

Good for whore.

Posted by Vasek | December 12, 2013 9:14 PM

lol she reads every post on here. she just indirectly called out glossy on her post on twitter. someone has wayyyy toooo much time on their hands especially as an "artist" scared of confrontations or all talk?...hm lol

Posted by Anonymous | December 13, 2013 1:55 PM

Pfttt gloss is a legend who is this chick and why was i linked here. beyonce just dropped an amazing album out of nowhere. lets all talk about how great she is ok.

Posted by Anonymous | December 13, 2013 2:03 PM

THIS


3:15 PM

Mademoiselle Hether seems oh so offended by anon BV comments, and apparently spends an awful lot of time reading them on a regular basis, because, get this , women are verbally * degraded* !!! BUT Mother Monster has no problem whatsoever
with peeing in some dentist's mouth for $500/ session. THAT is not degradation. THAT is artistic expression. THAT is sexual exploration.


Posted by Anonymous | December 13, 2013 2:32 PM

Anybody think D and Hether should hook up? they're both opinionated, they both blab about stupid shit all day long, D is hard up, Hether will have sex with anyone who looks at her. Sounds like a perfect match.

Posted by Anonymous | December 13, 2013 9:29 PM

if you go back to the early thurston / kim breakup articles, you will find authentic D comments posted that are pretty misogynistic. I wouldn't wish D on any women except a few of my ex's. It would be cool if they gang banged him. Supposedly two of them hooked up with each other after I was out of the picture, so it's not outside the realm of possibility.

Posted by Anonymous | December 13, 2013 10:42 PM

cool to pee on businessmen as a pastime or job, not cool to piss into the wind acting superior with no redeeming musical content. Why not write a song about it if you're so great at music? How could it be worse than what you've already recorded?

Posted by Anonymous | December 13, 2013 10:53 PM

Exactly, pissing in the wind. But don't say one thing is a degrading cesspool ( BV, a goof) and her thing ( tying up guy's dicks and dripping hot wax on them) isn't
degrading. It's hypocritical. And where's the transparency when it comes to the wives of these guys? " Yeah, I got Howie's dick locked up right now. I'm about to light a candle. Wanna come over? We're cool, right?"

Posted by Anonymous | December 14, 2013 1:08 PM

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