Marilyn Manson bassist Jeordie White, also known as Twiggy Ramirez, was accused of rape and abuse by his former girlfriend, Jessicka Addams of riot grrrl band Jack off Jill. The accusations came from a statement Addams posted to Facebook, where she detailed some of her experience with Ramirez and explained her decision to come forward now, 20 years after the events she describes. Addams says she was encouraged not to go public with her story by people like Jack off Jill's record label. "In 1997," she says, "I was warned by my band’s record company that if I revealed my story publically, there would be a very good chance that my band Jack Off Jill would be black balled by concert promoters, radio programmers, and other bands and their managers. Jack Off Jill was also warned of running the risk of losing our coveted record deal (which they gave us!!,) as they were certain no one would ever take a rape victim in this male dominated music business seriously, nevermind a ferocious, disenfranchised, outspoken overweight front woman such as myself! The label blatantly feared the big machine behind Marilyn Manson would use their power to destroy not only Jack Off Jill, but my name, Jessicka, as well. The pressure and guilt of the inevitable repercussions of my rape story affecting my band’s livelihood, happiness and success kept me silent for years."

In her statement, which you can read in full on her Facebook, Addams describes episodes of abuse and physical violence she experienced from White:

Once our band Jack Off Jill started to gain a following locally, abuse and mild violence between Jeordie and I began to escalate. He got increasingly jealous when I hung out with male friends. He jumped into the New River as a protest to me giving a male friend a ride home. He began to body shame me. He slashed my tires. When I came home late one night, he put one of the stuffed animals he bought me into the burning oven in the kitchen. But, I stayed, because I was conditioned since a child to endure my abuser. And this for me… was love at 19.

The physical abuse did not start until a few months later when Jeordie took a cage full of our pet white mice and dumped them into my mother's car that I was borrowing at the time. That is the first day I can remember him hitting me over me over and over as the mice scattered. He later apologized profusely and said it would never happen again.

But it happened again, and again, and often. He stacked junk yard TVs in front of my car so I could not leave as he did not have a car or could drive at the time. Everything he did was in order to control me or fat shame me. I fought back, but I was never able to find the courage to leave. I was broken. He was able to take my power away while still projecting that he cared for me.

Addams goes on to describe a night during which, she says, she feared for her life:

Trent Reznor was in South Florida around this time and we all went out on night. Trent and I struck up a conversation and Jeordie became so enraged he demanded we leave immediately. He began driving my car erratically on the highway, all the while punching me the chest several times,knocking the air out of my lungs. He proceeded to rip off the rear view mirror and threw it out the open window. Throughout the madness, this was a rather poignant moment. He just couldn’t bear to face himself in that mirror. So he proceeded to destroy it. Perhaps after everything he had done to somebody he claimed he loved was the sick reason he needed to become somebody else.

Near the end of her statement, Addams recounts the alleged rape:

During a short break on tour opening for Nine Inch Nails, Jeordie returned home to what was just Pete's apartment, as I was now staying with friends. I knew at that point that Jeordie had not been faithful on tour, including being with women whom I to this day respect and considered my musical contemporaries. All this led to an argument I never saw coming. He forced me on to the floor with his hand around my neck. I said NO. I said NO. I said it so loud enough, that Pete came rushing in from the other room to get him off of me. But I had been raped. I had been raped by somebody I thought I loved. That night I slept in Pete's bed and cried myself to sleep. Neither of us discussed it until years later as we both had our own shame about not reporting it.

Addams had previously alluded to the rape in a 2015 interview with Alternative Press, where, speaking to her 19 year old self, she said, "don't allow anybody—especially your current boyfriend—to verbally ridicule you, psychically abuse and rape you, fat-shame you, break your spirit, make you second-guess yourself and ultimately steal your identity." She experienced an outpouring of support after the interview, and found people coming to her with their own stories, as well. After seeking therapy and consulting with friends and family, she decided it was finally time to tell her story.

Jeordie White has also toured with Nine Inch Nails and played bass for A Perfect Circle.